Type for you life.

In the period since I last updated, we had a night of hard rain and it knocked all the leaves off the trees. This left Shikaoi looking very different from the pictures I posted last week. Now it's just grey and brown and barren. It's so nice to be writing something other than that bloody novel at the moment, though I really should be adding words there if I want to make my deadline. I admit it's been a while since I last posted, but I have not been idle, my fingers have been turned into stubs from typing, my eyes bloodshot; over 17,000 words have passed from my brain, into my hands, and onto the screen. That's a lot. To try to give my readers some idea of what a challenge NaNoWriMo is, I wanted to share some excerpts from a thread entitled "Dirty ways to reach 50k" on the NaNoWriMo forums. It won't turn the manuscript into something publishable, but many writers can identify with these tempting methods to make their total:

• Dreams. Lots and lots of dreams.


• Description. LOTS of description.


• Flashbacks. Often inserted in awkward places.


• Step 1: Grab cat around middle.
  Step 2: With a vertical stroking motion, maneuver the cat's front paws across the keyboard, producing a barrage of characters.
  Step 3: Take notes.
  Step 4: After NaNoWriMo, write a book detailing your experiences. Title it Why Cats Type. Include artistic photos.


• Introduce a hearing challenged character... and have lots of dialogue.
  "The train will be here in five minutes."
  "What?"
  "I said the train will be here in five minutes."
  "It isn't raining." etc.


• Interject character's thoughts as stream of consciousness every ten words or so.


• Chapters Titles, The longer and the more ridiculous, the better.


• Have a character try to tell a joke to a person. Except every few seconds someone comes in and wants to hear it from the start. At first the character can get annoyed, but then have them think of better and more dramatic ways of telling it and they get really enthusiastic.


• Never use contractions or acronyms.


• Famous quotes can jazz up a book. Consider starting each chapter with a relevant Shakespearean play.


• Wikipedia is your friend. "Warden, you want me to rat on my buddy? Not for all the tea in China! Which, by the way, was made from tea bricks prior to the Ming Dynasty when Emperor Hung-wu decreed that tributes of tea to the court were to be changed from brick to loose-leaf form. So fry me, cuz I ain't talkin'!"


• Public record government documents can add odd bits of randomness to your plot. Say, for example, bill H. Con. Res. 13, 'Recognizing the importance of blues music, and for other purposes,' introduced in this year's Congress, which provides a fast 425 words and an increased appreciation for what politicians do all day.


• Make sure all of your characters have at least four middle names.


• Title a chapter "One more time, only this time, with Pirates!" Then re-write the chapter, adding pirates.


• Anyone using a gadget in your book should be sure to read the instructions first, including the French and German translations. It's just good sense. Also, foods are much more interesting if your descriptions include ingredients and nutritional values


• Give a detailed life and history and character profile of everyone of your characters even if they only appear in one sentence.


• Making and eating food offer a great oppurtunity to describe a meal in detail, make sure to include the full recipe and nutritional value.


• Don't delete anything. Ever. If you end up with large chunks of plot that no longer make sense, leave 'em in and make them fever dreams and traumatic acid-trip flashbacks.