Friday, August 25, 2006

The Week that Has Been:

While all the news I present today is true; it is not meant to reflect poorly on Japanese society as a whole. Actually I meant it to mean opposite; the mere lack of crime - let alone the lack violent crime - means that, in my opinion, the only crime that does in fact bubble to the surface is extremely strange in nature. It is a great comfort to me in this respect. Lastly, it maybe helpful to remember that all this news is generated from a country much smaller than Alberta but with many many times the population.

The lead story for last night's evening news that keeps going:
Paper shredders! Yes, injuries from paper shredders are on the rise in Japan. Almost seven injuries in a decade. Society grinds to a halt. Government panels convene. Politicians make speeches. Opinion polls studied. New policies made. Paper shredders blamed for any and everything.

Other news stories:
- Junior high school student confesses he torched home because he didn't want to study.
- Poacher gets shot.
- Award winning writer states in essay that she throws unwanted kittens off cliff-tops. (This happened outside of Japan, but it's still one of Japan's own.)
- Wild man on river bank injures two with knife.
- Red light runners as usual.
- Another wrong suspect jailed for too long.
- Precisely 4,200 pears stolen from Oita prefecture.

And the classic:
All the elements are as present; A good girl, a bad girl who may have been good but went bad, J-cop detectives covering the tips from all angles, some oxygen, a mask, a department store, and - lastly - an umbrella. In a bizarre story from Shinjuku (in Tokyo). A customer recently tried an oxygen machine at a department store's health equipment section. 20 minutes later she returned to the salesperson asking to see the manager saying she did not feel good, only to turn around and stab said salesperson in the eye with the tip of her umbrella before fleeing the scene.

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